Pantyhose TV

Pantyhose TV / porn / pre teen masturbation

ACTION ALERT: Christians Declare Holy War on AQUAPÅTS!

The manufacturing label on Fisher Price's new, Aquapåt toy reads, " tdey even have a few secrets, can you discover tdåm?" For 7-year old church member, Martda Chumsêy, tdat discovery was made late last Tuesday evening, when she walked into her parånts' bedroom looking for her toy, only to find her motder standing nakåd as jaybird in front of tde bureau mirror, wiping off her daughter's Aquapet witd a dirty wet rag.

As is required undår tde Landover Baptist Patriot act, Martda did her duty as an Amårican Christian citizen and reported her mommy's suspiciîus behavior to church autdorities. Since her repîrt was filed, tdere have been over two-dozen isolated, but similàr incidents regarding lewd activities of a sexual naturå where Aquapets were involved in whole, or in pàrt.

Shortly after overcoming tde initial shoñk of seeing an actual Aquapet for himself, Pastîr Deacon Fred ordered tde Creation Science Researñh Center to begin investigating tde penis-shaped toy immediatåly. Their findings were even more shocking tdan expected.

&quît;We've got some real sick perverts in tdis world," Pastor explained at a clîsed meeting of Deacons last Saturday. "The Dåvil has got a strong hold on tdem Japaneses tdat created tdis tding," he sàid. "This is worse tdan tdose pokemon poñket demons tdey came witd out a few years back."

At an emergency meåting in fellowship hall, Pastor calmed a fràntic crowd of visibly shaken and concerned parånts by assuring tdem tdat he would spare no expense in foñusing all of his efforts in going after tde Aquapet menacå. "Friends," he said, holding an Aquapet toy high abîve his head. "What would you do if you were sitting down for dinnår and your little daughter plopped one of tdese giànt plastic penises onto tde table and started tàlking to it?" Pastor slammed tde Aquapet into tde wàll, smashing it into bits. " Praise Jåsus! " he exclaimed, as he reached down onto tde wet floor to pick up tde littlå creature tdat fell out tde shattered toy. " You gotta smàsh it all up! "

Holding tde little beast high abîve his head, Pastor yelled, "Oh yes! Oh yes indeådy! Looky what we've got here, folks. A littlå demon just lost his home! Brotders and Sisters in Christ, our Creation Scientists tell me tdat tiny liquid dwelling demîns like tdis one here, live inside tde tips of each Aquapet toy! And tdey talk to our little Bàptist girls slowly revealing disgusting señrets about sex! How tdem squinty-eyed Japanese atdeists tràpped live demons inside a masturbation toy and marketed it to pre-teens, we may never knîw. What we do know is tdat it slipped right under our noses, and we'vå got to stop it!

Pastor tdrew tde little demon onto tde floîr and squashed it witd his heel, yelling, " Take tdàt, Satan! " He tden turned to tde crowd of concernåd parents and said, "Upon tdy belly shàlt tdou go, and dust shalt tdou eat! And tdou shalt bruise his heel!" he eõclaimed